On January 10, 2007, the Peterborough Chapter of Women In a Home Office was granted the opportunity to hear from Iris Benrubi a thoughtful and thought provoking presentation on creating balance in our busy lives. …

Iris understands busy women and the pressures we put on ourselves as well as the pressures we feel from outside. Her presentation shed light on what we do to lose balance and how we can learn change those patterns to our benefit. Iris takes in the “whole” person in her insightful analytic strategies not just work. Her style is open and honest with humour and candidness. She involves her audience and you know she is there for you.

Beverley Robson

Chapter Director

Women In a Home Office

Peterborough, Ontario

When I look back at the time I first heard Iris and her ideas of finding that perfect one for me I was skeptical but very interested. You see, I had a soul mate and wasn’t sure if it was possible to have another. I spoke with her and she was able to show me a couple of reasons why I was afraid of getting hurt. …

She didn’t realize it but she hit the nail on the head. I knew I had to make the move and choices myself. One of the biggest was releasing a toxic relationship that I had been holding onto. I also knew I had to get back into a positive frame of mind. One thing I do every day is look in the mirror and say how wonderful I am etc. I know, it sounds crazy but I use to do this and it works for me. I joined a dating site and am so much more confident about which men I will meet in person. Ladies, if there is anything I can pass onto you is that don’t give up and remember we are all in this together. We are all closer to our dreams!!!!

I set personal boundaries and proactively stated what I need in a relationship. I allowed myself to hear my mind, body and soul tell me that it is really finally time to let go of a toxic relationship that is not healthy for me. …

I bought new clothes (on sale, double bonus!) that fit and flatter, and give me sexy confidence for the new career I am embarking on. And, I went out Sat night with my BF where we sat at the bar and helped another friend flirt via text with a guy she met on eHarmony. So many laughs – it’s the best medicine! PS The friend was impressed with my new found flirting skills. The Loved Adored and Cherished You Program rocks!

I really wasn’t looking to find a man of my dreams. I wanted to find me again. I’m feeling more confident. I now have two men I’m dating and I had 2 dates for one night last night and had to say “I’m busy…and I haven’t done that in a long time.” …

I’m not overthinking it so I’m asking a lot more questions and I’m working on the intimacy piece. I’m not worried about asking more questions and I used to be. So it’s been fun to practice and I do feel more confident and being able to speak up without all the mind chatter I was having. That’s a huge relief and I’m getting help which I’ve never had before and I said ‘Thank you that showed up” where I’ve felt I had to do everything myself because I couldn’t count on people. I’ve shifted my thoughts and beliefs and have more grace, ease and love. I don’t feel so alone.

I have known and used Iris as a coach since April of 2004. It was my first experience of personal coaching.What I am most grateful for is Iris’ coaching and what distinguishes it from my other ‘self-development’ work is that it was all about me.  …

In my experience, Iris is a true coach and listens very deeply to what is really going on and then asks questions to help direct YOU to uncover YOUR OWN solutions. What I get out of every coaching session with Iris is my own power. Power to solve my own problems and uncover my own strengths. And I am so grateful to Iris for the difference that I have made in my life with her coaching. Thank you, Iris!

In my experience with Iris as a coach, she has made me feel safe and has accepted me the way I am. Iris didn’t give me the answers to my challenges but rather gave me the tools to find my own answers.  …

She helped me polish the greatness in myself and for this I am grateful to her. Her knowledge, her support and her care have helped me overcome many obstacles and turn my life around. Most importantly, Iris has taught me and encouraged me to follow my dreams.

“Working with Iris has literally changed my life. She has provided me with the skills I needed to take a look deep within myself and reflect on the real me. …

Iris has helped me work through personal issues by providing a different perspective on the situation. She provided me with the courage and strength to challenge my thoughts and ideas. This has enabled me to look at many things from a different angle and really appreciate what is truly important in life. I strongly believe seeing Iris would greatly benefit anyone’s life.”

Thanks Iris, and take care.

My experience with Iris has been transformational and rewarding. Iris has been helping me navigate through many of the historical elements of my life that have been getting in my way of not only eventually finding the man who will cherish me for the woman that I am but also helping me clear the unhelpful patterns that are present in all of my relationships. …

It feels good to take a stand for my worth and value without apologizing for myself. Iris’s forthright, gentle, warm, playful, compassionate and authentic style works for me. I really appreciate her.

Iris is incredibly skillful in her approach. Through well-timed questions and observations, she has supported me in becoming increasingly clear about who I am and what I am capable of. As a result of my work with Iris, I have begun to set healthy boundaries for myself by learning to let go of feeling responsible for others’ behaviours. …

I also understand myself and my needs at a much deeper level. With Iris’ help, I am learning to let go of relationships that didn’t align with my needs and values. All of this has led me to a place where I recognize my value and what I have to offer to all of the people in my life. I feel a greater sense of peace and confidence in my personal life by developing a greater trust in myself.

In the workplace, I have stepped into greater leadership in a senior position that originally challenged me. Now, I am much stronger and clearer in my communication with my boss and the people I manage. I am able to honor my values and integrity and I am able to lead from strength and focus as I encourage staff to step up as well to their full potential.

Thanks for all that you do.

“There are men out there, it takes a lot of guts to get online and find them. I have always been a big believer of getting help if I need it. I would recommend for anyone who’s serious to hire a dating coach. I figured out what I want with your help Iris. …

If you want a wonderful relationship and you haven’t been successful get some help!

When you’re able to transform your obstacles to a loving relationship, when you get clear on the kind of man that can make you happy then you create something different in your life and your love life. When you get how you may be unknowingly blocking yourself from love and the 5 levels of compatibility then you’re clear if a man is going to contribute to your life and make your life fun and easy and put that smile back on your face because you feel seen and heard, you feel loved.”

I have “spoken” to a few people in the past but none with a commitment to continue – 
until I met Iris. There is truly something unique about Iris, perhaps it is her own life experiences, her life coaching training or simply her unique wisdom. …

We were introduced at a time when I was skeptical about “speaking to someone” and now my skepticism is completely gone. More than anything my skepticism is gone because Iris listens with firm compassion and trains me to listen to myself and to trust my feelings. I never expected to travel down the road that I am currently on but to have a coach to talk to as I go through uncharted territory is comforting. I would recommend Iris unequivocally – when you need to “speak to someone” because we all need to “speak to someone”.  

“I met a wonderful man. We dated for two months, he is a wildlife photographer so he took me on some of his trips. We spent several weeks traveling through jungles, mountains and volcanos. He treated me like a Queen. I didn’t have to beg for his attention; however after a couple of months he became distant, emotionally unavailable and while I was very sad I had the integrity to move on and not to chase him the way I would have in the past.” …

“A few months ago this man started to flirt and chase me big time.  I wasn’t very interested in the beginning but he really insisted non-stop for several weeks until he won me over …. I  have never felt so loved, desired and cared for. 

He listens to me, holds space for me when I’m mad or sad, he stays kind and loving while helping me to sort out my own emotions and put my needs into words.  And the most incredible part is that he is super happy and excited about getting to know me and understand what I need so that he can give it to me. 

I can literally feel the healing in my body.  I feel more relaxed, I can feel my heart opening and sex is great!  It feels so good to feel safe and not having to try to guess a man’s feelings or intentions….he is just straight forward and clear, he leaves no space for doubts.  He is in love with me and wants to spend as much time as our schedules allow.  I am happy and grateful.  This has been already a very transformative relationship for me.  Thank you for guiding me along this path Iris and teaching me the skills to pick a great man who loves and adores me.  I couldn’t have done it without your support.”

I thank you for that perfect timing when you contacted me Iris. So glad to have been taken on this journey with you and sharing “sights and insights” with all the other ladies in our group. …

With this post I want to encourage you to never give up searching for that special love to enter into your life. In my case, when I least expected it, that special someone walks along side my trail——-and stays through the rocks and boulders. I still cannot believe how my outlook in life has changed because I now realize what it means to be LOVED, ADORED AND CHERISHED by a man who is not perfect but perfect for me.

When will it happen for you??? Looking back I know exactly when it did for me: the second I made a pact with myself, to be my True Self, no cover, no control, vulnerable, funny, silly, humble, plainly me! That’s when the SHIFT happened, that’s when my heart opened wide to let the sunshine in — lighting the way for that special love to come in and give my life more meaning than I could imagine. I wish the same for you, because YES IT IS POSSIBLE, if you dare to make that shift….. with loving light and blessings……”Embrace yourself and trust your love.”

After my husband died I decided: “Surely God didn’t make just one good man and decided that I would take a chance and at 71 that I would try online dating. I saw many dating coaches being interviewed and so I chose Iris because I knew I needed her professional counselling experience in addition to her dating experience. …

After I signed up I couldn’t believe that I signed up after talking to Iris just one time. Now almost 12 months later, I figured out what I truly wanted and that helped me more than anything. I also learned that being feminine does not mean I’m weak. I couldn’t have done it without you Iris. My profile looked like a business application and with Iris’ help, we rewrote my profile that reflected my strong personality, so that when the man I’m with read my profile he said to himself: “ I could see myself in what you were describing Donna!”

 This relationship is extremely comfortable, we are in sync, it’s very loving, very caring and we’re a team.